STORY: Andrew’s Deep Thoughts

Andrew sees Betsey Horton writing a story about Duke and gets jealous. He wants his own story about his really deep thoughts, because let me tell you, he has plenty of them, you guys. Here's a list of ten of Andrew's deepest, most secret thoughts. Yeah, I'm The Star. Did... Read More

SCRIPT: Hostile Takeover

Betsey is mad AF and she's not gonna take it anymore. She storms into Bloody Mary's Bar right in the middle of an employee meeting. Betsey: Hello boys! All of the cranky old men are so shocked by her inability to give a single fuck about them calling the Rich... Read More

STORY: The Rat-Rat

Meanwhile, at Bloody Mary's Bar, Andrew is very angry that his little "project" hasn't gone according to plan. As he cannot possibly have Betsey Horton arrested for writing in her notebook, he decides to have her followed. He wants to find out her deepest, darkest secret so he can use... Read More

Meanwhile, at Bloody Mary’s Bar…

A little birdie has come in and informed the Line of Death that Betsey Horton, Writer Extraordinaire, has broken the rules once again and written about them on her website. Andrew pulls it up on his phone, reads it aloud in dismay, and looks out over his audience with a... Read More

STORY: The Man Who Took Himself Way Too Seriously

One evening, I was sitting atop my perch at Bloody Mary's, writing in my notebook. The music on the radio was a cool, groovy, jazzy hip hop I vaguely recognized but couldn't quite place. I decided to ask a bartender for more information about the current musical selection. Unfortunately, they... Read More