BLOG: Finding Balance

Sunday. Currently watching Mediterranean Life on HGTV. They are apartment hunting in Nice on this episode. Let’s just say I’m really jealous I’m not eating fresh oysters and drinking rosé on the French Riviera right at this very moment. Alas. Maybe someday.

Yesterday was very productive on the writing front. After months and months of planning and struggle, I finally sat down and put together my brand new blog business plan. Now, it’s not perfect yet. It’s just the rough draft, but it’s a lot further along than it was a few months ago when it was just in the planning stages. Now it actually looks like a “real business plan.”

I have the concept figured out. I spent the last 9 months or so researching other blogs, niches, designs, and digital marketing campaigns. I listed out all of my experiences that I can write about and started picking out ideas with similar themes. I got a course on WordPress for Business and one on Starting a Freelance Writing Business, so I will be able to take the concept I have now and transform it into a profitable venture.

I learned how to do all of this in Paris. There were two people there who blogged for business. I spoke with one extensively for hours and hours over dinner. She was retiring from the travel blogger life and she passed on her secrets of success to me. Now here I am almost a year later, working on implementing the plan she inspired me to create. I should send her an email and thank her for everything.

Writing is hard. Finding the balance between creativity and business is even harder. At least I feel like I am making progress, even if it’s taking forever!

I did make progress on the Andrew front. He finally agreed to back off and let me tend to other projects. Thank god. He truly was beginning to suffocate me with his presence. I’ve made so many concessions for him, yet he has given me nothing in return. It’s about time he shut up for awhile. He says he is going to stick around to “supervise my stories,” whatever that means. Hopefully it means he will just leave me alone and let me write in peace.

No further progress on the screenplay, but that is okay. I reflected on the projects I spent the last four years developing on this blog. I felt relief knowing it was okay to hit a dead end. I would rather have a pile of dead end scripts than no pile at all. Every successful writer has a pile of crap stashed in their desk. They didn’t all just magically become great overnight.

I’m finding balance between projects, which is exciting. I spent the first half of the week focused on the screenplay and the second half focusing on the writing business. It’s been a productive week over all in spite of all of the IRL difficulties. So much stress in every day life. Writing is my only escape. I just love being in my own little world where no one else can bother me.

I feel good about the writing, but bad about everything else. Shoes couldn’t fix it. Alcohol couldn’t fix it. A quiet movie night at home couldn’t fix it. I was just so sad and frustrated with everything. I know the only thing that will fix it is a Big Change. I know it will come soon, but… the fact that neither my job nor my apartment are guaranteed for two months really scares me. I had an anxiety attack on the way to work and had to turn around. I totally just freaked out. The whole situation is just… scary, depressing, and sad.

Time to escape back to my own little world away from the rest of humankind. That means dreaming about my apartment in Paris that I will someday own. Someday, someday…

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