Table of Contents

ARTICLES
  • ***COMING SOON***
BLOG
  • Currently undergoing “re-branding efforts.” Read something else instead.
COLUMNS
  • The Volante (2010-2014) – The weekly column I wrote for my college newspaper.
FAN FICTION
  • FanFiction.Net Archive (2002-2010). Once upon a time, I wrote fanfiction. I am not ashamed to admit this. I had a following. I won awards. It made me the writer I am today. Please enjoy on behalf of socially awkward teenagers everywhere.
NOVELS
  • Absolut Paris (2007) – A novel about a teenage girl who runs away to Paris and has an affair with her French teacher. It only sounds like it was written by a seventeen-year-old girl because it was written by a seventeen-year-old girl.
  • Something Something, Set It All On Fire (present)
POETRY
  • ***COMING SOON***
PROMPTS
SCRIPTS
  • The Catfish (2017) – A comedic reflection on the many trials and tribulations of online dating, featuring Andrew as The Catfish.
  • High School Reunion (2017) – I couldn’t attend my (public) high school reunion, so I decided to imagine what it would be like if I did. Fun fact: this is the highest-read post on my website of all time. More people read this post than attended the actual reunion! Pretty cool, right?
  • The Island of Lost Guys (2016) – What would happen if all of my exes were trapped on an island together? Click here to find out! Sequel coming soon!
  • Spy Movie (2005) – A short script I wrote for a high school theatre class. A parody of a James Bond film, starring women, of course.
SHORT STORIES
  • Andrew – (dates questionable) An incredibly small sampling of the many, many ridiculous stories about Andrew.
  • Bloody Mary’s Bar (2016-2018) – Short stories and scripts inspired by my favourite bar in all the world. These are supposed to be parodies. Apparently I’m the only person in this town with a sense of humor.
  • Travel Tales (2016-2017) – Stories about the various strange characters I encountered while traveling through the Southwest.
  • FictionPress Archive (2006-2008) – Short stories I wrote in high school. I guess it’s interesting enough for people to click on, so here it is!